Asking for Help From the Right People
Students learn to describe a problem clearly enough for a trusted adult to understand, match the type of problem to the right type of person, understand that peer-level support has limits and seek adult help without shame, keep a mental or written list of three trusted adults in different places, and notice when a classmate needs help and either offer support or help them find an adult.
Lesson Overview
What students will be able to do after this lesson: Students will be able to describe a problem clearly enough for a trusted adult to understand, match the problem type to the right person, seek adult help without shame, name three trusted adults in different settings, and notice when a classmate needs support and respond at the right level.
Skill segments at a glance:
| Segment | Segment name | Primary standards |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Describe It and Find the Right Person | RS-HLP-3-1 · RS-HLP-3-2 |
| 2 | Adults Are for This — and Know Your Three | RS-HLP-3-3 · RS-HLP-3-4 |
| 3 | When Your Friend Is the One Who Needs Help | RS-HLP-3-5 |
Supporting standards reinforced:
| Code | Why it connects |
|---|---|
| SM-MHL-3-5 | Telling a trusted adult you’re struggling uses the same clear description and willingness to seek support built in Segments 1 and 2 of this lesson — the script built here reinforces that help-seeking phrase directly. |
| RS-BDR-3-5 | Reporting a safety concern requires the same specific, direct problem description built in Segment 1 — naming the event, the person, and asking for help rather than giving a vague account. |
Key Vocabulary
- trusted adult — A grown-up in your life who you know will listen, take you seriously, and try to help.
- help-seeker — Someone who knows when they need support and knows how to ask for it. Being a good help-seeker is a skill.
- peer support — Help from a friend or classmate. Peer support is useful for many things — and for some problems, it is not enough, and that is okay.
Materials
- Whiteboard or chart paper and markers
- Before the week begins: Post your unit anchor chart and I Can Statement where students can see them — you’ll reference both throughout the week.
- Optional: 3-column chart paper with headers At School / At Home / In the Community — useful for Segment 2
How this lesson is structured: Each skill segment below has an I Do (teacher models the skill with a realistic scenario) and a We Do (class practices together with your guidance). Independent practice — the You Do — lives in the practice resources that go alongside this lesson.
What Students Need Before This Lesson
- What’s inside
- What students should already be able to do
- Helpful to have in place
- 3 quick set-ups before the I DoVague vs. specific — “something happened” is not enough information · Match the problem to the person — not everyone helps with everything · Asking an adult doesn’t mean you failed — it means you know your tools
- Rescue planIf students are significantly behind
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
Introducing the Skill
- What’s inside
- Opening hook
- What we’re learning
- Why it matters
- Core sentence frameThe frame students use all week
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
Describe It and Find the Right Person
- What’s inside
- I do: 4 teacher modelsTextbook example: clear description and the right person match · Wrong version → fix: what vague sounds like and why it does not work · Non-conflict situation: the skill used as everyday planning, not crisis management · Complex match: a home problem goes to a different person than a school problem
- We do: 4 guided scenariosWith sentence frames, pacing notes and what to watch for
- Coaching in the momentWhat to say when students get stuck
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
Adults Are for This — and Know Your Three
- What’s inside
- I do: 3 teacher modelsShame reframe: what it looks and sounds like to ask without making it feel like failure · Building the list: three adults, three places · Non-conflict situation: knowing your adults as everyday information, not emergency planning
- We do: 3 guided scenariosWith sentence frames, pacing notes and what to watch for
- Coaching in the momentWhat to say when students get stuck
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
When Your Friend Is the One Who Needs Help
- What’s inside
- I do: 3 teacher modelsTextbook noticing: recognizing the signal and offering the right level of support · Wrong version → fix: overreaching vs. getting the right person · Non-conflict situation: noticing a friend who is doing fine but could use a check-in
- We do: 3 guided scenariosWith sentence frames, pacing notes and what to watch for
- Coaching in the momentWhat to say when students get stuck
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
Closing the Week
- What’s inside
- 3 partner-share roundsOne for each segment, with the frame students say together
- Round 1 — Describing the problem and finding the right person
- Round 2 — Knowing when to go to a grown-up
- Round 3 — Noticing when a friend needs help
- Land the key idea
This section opens when Grade 3 launches.
Practice for every skill segment
Each lesson comes with independent practice — the “you do” — for each of its 3 skill segments, in print and digital.
Printable practice
Ready-to-copy practice pages for each segment.
- View and print in your browser
- Answer keys for quick checking
Digital activities
Share one link — students open it on any device, and you see their answers.
- Works on Chromebooks, tablets and phones
- Students just type their name to start
While you wait: from the SEL Resource Library
Relationship Skills resources for Grade 3, ready to use today.
